Fall 2016

I have been waiting for weeks for a nice, sunny fall day to take pictures and today it finally happened! Nico is sitting next to me as a type, completely exhausted from a nice walk in the forest by our house. But he seemed to enjoy the walk, and the cookies that he got to eat along the way.

Christian claims he saw a moose, but we have no evidence of that. So you'll have to take his word for it. Nico liked walking over the bridge and pretend he was one of the Bukkene Bruse running from the Troll. 

I haven't posted in a very long time. But these pictures seemed worthy of sharing. 

Now, we are ready for winter.

Let me work

There have been lots of interviews, application letters and CV translations during the past months.  It has been a really frustrating process with few outcomes. But that is how applying for jobs is like. You try and then when you don't get the job, you try again. That is normal and I am dealing with it. However, I have encountered many instances where I am not given an opportunity at a job because I have a kid. I have heard numerous times that I am not flexible enough and that I won't be able to meet their time requirements. Basically, I don't get the job because I am a mom.

I thought that in 2016 and specially in a country like Norway this would not be a problem. Did someone ask my husband if he'd be able to meet his work demands because he's a father? I doubt it. But then, why can't I be trusted to do the same? After all, I did finish my masters degree on time and got an excellent grade and barely complained. I am kidding, I complained a lot. But I did it! 

After the past few interviews i've been at, I decided I needed to write down my feelings. I am first of all saddened at the fact that I can't seem to get a relevant job. I understand that A) I am a foreigner and that makes the whole process longer, and B) I have little work experience in Norway and everything i've done in the past is not accounted for.  

But, I am a focused and hardworking person. I have a great husband that is also a devoted father and actually takes part in the parental responsibilities. Shocking, huh? We BOTH take turns taking Nico to day care and picking him up. We take turns staying at home when he's sick. It's not just me, the mom, who carries all the weight. I promise you, future employer, i'll make it to the 8 am shift, or stay after 4 pm. I am not limited to being a mother, I can be salesperson, a teacher, a journalist, a writer or a counselor if I want to. It should be up to me to be in time for work, and to be successful in whatever I pursue. If an employer thinks that I am not meeting their demands while at work, then they can decide to let me go.  But I really wish I could get a chance to prove myself instead of getting all these rejections because of my family situation.

Do I weigh out all the risks?

Of course I do! When I apply for a job I always think about how it will affect our routine, how far away I have to commute and how accessible it is by public transportation. Trust me, I wouldn't apply for a job that I couldn't do. If I agree to go to an interview it is because I have assessed all the positives and negatives that the job entails and I still deem it appropriate. 

Why don't I get hired?

I doubt that it's because I am not qualified to sell clothes, or to serve coffee. Is it because I am a mother? Is it because I am a woman? I really hope its just because they have another candidate that is more qualified, and not because they are still discriminating agains job seekers in 2016.

End of rant. Here are some pictures to lighten up this post.

"No!"

I think most parents dread the day their kid learns how to say "NO!" It makes sense.  It's hard to bargain with a defiant little one who thinks its funny to repeat the word "no" every time they don't want to do something. I think I fall out of that category of parents. When Nico first said "no" I was ecstatic!

Having a trilingual child has made every word really count. So today when he said "NO!" after I asked him to finish his breakfast, I was happier than I was annoyed. Wow, he speaks! He actually directed a word to me on purpose! Of course I am sure i'll get used to it and it will stop being cute, but the fact is, any words that come from Nico are encouraging us to continue teaching him all three languages.

Another novelty has been the fact that we've found ourselves having to ask Nico to stop talking.  This kid who would communicate in groans and gestures up until a few weeks ago is suddenly babbling the whole day long. His sentences are mixed up and I believe just me and Christian fully understand what he says. Nico comes up to us and says things like "borte camión rød"... which en English translates to "the red truck is gone".

I am having difficulties getting him to separate the languages because of the fact that I am also learning Norwegian.  Nico knows I speak Norwegian to other people, so its hard to set a boundary between Spanish and Norsk. English doesn't get mixed up that much because we never directly talk to him in English.  It's just the language we use as a couple, so his vocabulary in English is not that mixed up.

I am still super proud of him for trying to say more and more.  I hope our family's conversational language will not be a total mess of mixed up sentences in the end.  We need to keep working on that.

Barnehage kids

I got a job! Ok, its not my dream job, but I think it works great for now.  I am working at an agency that sends me to different day cares, barnehager, in my area.  As a parent, this has been an enlightening experience because I get to see the inside of a barnehage and participate in their daily routines and games.

When I deliver Nico in his barnehage, I always wonder how he plays, or if he actually eats all his food or just drops it on the floor like he does often at home.  I basically want to know what kind of kid he is at barnehage.  Is he the funny one? Does he like to cuddle? Or is he the one climbing all over the place and encouraging others to do the same?

He obviously doesn't say much when we get home.

He might mention that he went outside to play in the snow and that he played with cars.  But thats pretty much it.

In my search of trying to figure out what kind of kid my son is I have used my experiences from work to compile a list of seven personalities that can be found at a Norwegian barnehage. These personalities are not referring to a specific child, but are more of a gathering of traits that are almost always present.

#1 The giggly girls: they come in pairs and are dressed in either pink or purple.  They will ask to play with your hair and dress up dolls.  They do everything together, eat together and nap together.  They don't cry unless one of them gets picked up.  They are easy to take care of since they entertain each other and require minimum attention.

#2 The tough girl: she might be the youngest in the group, but she will not let anyone take her toys.  She knows how to defend herself and doesn't take no for an answer.  This one is a bit harder to take care of because you might need to break up the fights that she starts when she takes the red car that another kid had.

#3 The cuddle-bug: there is always one kid who just wants to cuddle everyone, from teachers to other kids.  This kid spends about an hour sitting on someone's lap after nap time.  Its easy to take care of a kid like this because they just require holding and humming.

#4 The younger sibling: since I work with ages 0-3, chances are that they are they younger sibling of another kid in the day care.  These kids are usually advanced in speaking and playing more complicated games.  They will also ask you to sing the songs of Kaptain Sabeltann despite you having no idea what this is.  They are a bit harder to please but they are easy to communicate with and usually you can negotiate and sing Baa baa lille lamb instead.

#5 Karsten and Petra: If you haven't read these stories, they are about a boy and a girl that are best friends and their toy animals are friends too.  It seems that this is a pair often found in barnehage as well.  I think my son Nico falls in this category since I always find him playing with the same girl when I pick him up from barnehage and can even say her name.

#6 The energy bunny: This is the kid that all barnehage workers keep their eye on.  They climb cabinets, jump from the highest point in the room and run around in circles.  These are the kids that literally recharge after nap time and spend the afternoon burning up the energy again.  Despite them being fun to play around with, they might pose as danger for the smallest babies.  The parents that pick up these kids are usually very sporty Norwegians that use sleds to carry them home.

#7 The ultra Norwegian kid: This kid wears Marius genser to barnehage.  His matpakke is filled with healthy snacks and he leads the others down the snow slope.  This kid is really independent and might speak in dialect, making taking care of him or her an extra challenge for my own Norwegian skills.

I know I am probably missing a lot of personalities, this is just a short compilation of characteristics that one might find in a barnehage in Norway.  Some kids might be a #3 in the morning and a #6 after getting refueled from lunch.  I am just enjoying watching all these little personalities develop in their playing environment and I keep wondering what Nico does during his barnehage hours. At least I know he's an energy bunny when he comes home.

10 things I (don't) love about being a parent in winter

So, winter has finally hit Norway hard. I want to embrace it and enjoy the pretty snow and chilly air, really, I do! Especially after weeks of complaining that we didn't get snow during Christmas. To be honest, I would enjoy winter a lot more if I didn't have a two-year-old to drag along my daily routine. I feel it's a bit of a taboo to say that one does not enjoy parenting. That's not what I am trying to say. I enjoy being a mom, and I adore my son. I just don't particularly enjoy parenting during winter. Here I have gathered a list of 10 things I don't love about being a parent at the moment.

1. Every morning before going outside I have to wrestle a 16 kg squirming octopus into four layers of clothes.  My son prefers nakedness above all and convincing him to get into his snowsuit takes a big chunk of the morning.

2. When we finally make it out the door, the second challenge presents itself.  I have to carry a heavy stroller filled with lunch-boxes, blankets, sleeping bags and extra clothes down three flights of stairs. While holding the upset octopus in my arms.

3.  Once outside the building we begin our journey to day care.  Nico attends an outdoor barnehage (kindergarden) that lies one kilometer away from our place. During winter this kilometer is covered in ice and snow.  Despite its idyllic scenery, its quite the challenge to push a stroller though ice when one is not born with skis on one's feet.  As all Norwegians seem to be.

4. During our walk Nico takes his mittens off repeatedly.  It is almost impossible to fit small mittens onto a squirming octopus.

5. I enjoy the company of other parents on our walk to day care.  I don't enjoy the embarrassment of being the one that everyone has to wait for because I can't walk on ice.

6. Undressing the flailing octopus once we are indoors.

7. I do enjoy playing outside on our "kjelke" or sled.  Even though Nico is not that fond of it. We'll get there.

8. Hot cocoa sounds nice after an afternoon sledding, am I right? Think again! Nico will not by any means have anything to do with warm cacao. I thinks its partly because of all those times I've told him my coffee is just for mommy when he's tried to drink it.

9. Dressing myself. I also have to wear extra layers of clothes when I am outside playing with the little one. We both look like starfish.

10. I do love how cuddly Nico is after being out in the snow.  He just wants to cuddle me and warm up.  Plus, his little red nose in contrast with the white surroundings is a cute sight.